Upset

UPSET means feeling or showing uncomfortable feelings of uncertainty.

I was upset today. Its like I am trying to stay cheerful because I am afraid of setting fire to the highly flammable highstrung teammates' mood. But through my smiles and fakely cheerful composition, I am high-strung myself. I didn't realised it. And I guess someone torched me up. And I blew up. Not verbally. But mentally screaming all sorts of curses you normally would not associate with young demure ladies. Curiously enough, one part of me just yakked my furiously typing hands off the keyboard and quited my current means of non-verbal communication, "Skype". A wise move indeed. As without any conversation to distract me, I concentrated with all my might on my work. Without any oxygen to this blazing flame, I cooled off totally and realised that I was highly strung to be really pissed off by highly-strung people. And that I cared, thats why I am upset. If I don't care about you, I would not even bother. I ain't perfect, and I ain't trying to be perfect for someone else, but myself, so I only have myself to report to. I ain't an angel to myself even, but I am happy as I am progressively improving.

And yes, I am still sketching. Never stopping. Its not the quantity as you will get burnt out. But each time you do it, be mindful of WHAT you are doing. Blindly sketching will just be blind sketching. Have an objective each time you sketch. I realize I get better faster if I have an objective. But hey... not all cakes are baked the same way.

Cheerios!