/B/acon Party

Its weird, a small bunch of 6 of us. Gathering at Mao's place, eating Bacon, bacon, bacon, pork shabu shabu, infinite ham, and drinking only beer and vodka. And all with only one similarity.

AWESOME. Somehow I don't feel out of place with them. I feel really happy. Its a very simple gathering. And somehow, I am really happy despite shit that happened lately.

*Rolls around in childish happiness*

That and I start to find dogs cute.

I lost So Much

Ever have the feeling that though you have acheived something, you lost alot of others? Ever think that though you have monetary items, you lost Hopes? Dreams?

I can eat and afford alot of good stuff ever since -insert start working date here-. Yet all I want right now, is a bowl of homecooked instant noodles with whatever leftovers in the fridge that you can dump in, at 3am in the morning, and tired BUT happy, while doing my work. And anytime i want to, i can pick up my handphone next to me, and my best friends will be available to talk to me to keep me awake. While he or she is doing his or her work at the same time. And my mum to burst into my room, asking me to sleep! And nag non-stop, then end up cooking something in the morning so I can have a hearty breakfast to start another tiring but happy day.



I lost so much. For what?

Illustration.Monday challenge:

Interpretation of Song Title picked by Bubble Princess,

Alpha Beta Gaga by Air.

A very simple post.

Life is as you believe it will be.

If you think its great, its great. If you think it sucks, it sucks.

Sleepless Night

I thought this will never happen to me. But it did.

I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking of someone.

I just can't sleep. My room is in a mess. My table is in a mess. My feelings are also in a mess.

And that someone will be overseas for a long while. While I logically thinks its a great time to get my mind off him, I.. can't sleep. He's not even overseas yet, and already I am missing him.

I am pathetic. All i can do right now, is to draw.

And dammit, but my drawing look so serene and calm.

Somethings Just Don't Change... Does it?

Feeling very emo today.

Yesterday went out to play Left 4 Dead with a bunch of friends.(like close to midnight as work ended VERY LATE AGAIN) CRAZY TIME MAN. Its my first time playing at a LAN place. And hearing them cussing while you scream out of terror and out of purely a need to scream, totally different ambience! Most of the time they were just cussing for me to shut up. Hahahahaha. Funny people. Hahahahaha.

Basically this is how they play:

Nims: "...okay guys we need to stick together...and we ambush them at this junction.."

Pooky: "...when I give the signal..."

Rinny: "...alright. Let's do this..."

From any of their POV, their teammates are poised around the door, their guns pointed at it.

SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT.

Nims: "...quick! In here!"

Pooky: "... saving Rinny..."

Rinny: "...Saved! Protect Pooky, health low!"

-Game End"

My team, basically is very similar. But I don't understand how we can lose. Simply dont.

Eddie: "...okay guys we need to stick together...and we ambush them at this junction.."

KKYZ: "...when I give the signal..."

Me: "...what do I do with this?..."

Eddie: "...HOLYSH- DONT THROW THE FIREBOMB IN THE SAFEROOM!.."

KKYZ: "...HOLYSH- PUT IT DOWN NOW! PUT IT DOWN. DON'T THROW! DON'T!..."

From my POV,teammates are poised around the door, their guns are pointed at me.

SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT

KKYZ: "...quick! In here!"

Me: "AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH"

Eddie: "... save me! save me!..."

Me: "AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH"

Me strolls past Eddie

Eddie: "YUNDA! HERE! HERE! -CUSS CUSS- MF, you just walked pass me!"

Me: "AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH"

Me turned around and shoot.

Eddie: "WHERE YOU AIMING?! AIM THE ONE ON TOP OF ME! NOT AROUND ME! YOU!"

Me: "AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH"

I really don't understand how we can lose that badly. 4 digit score to 1 digit score.

Then we played Call of Duty: World at War. I boomered. My friends' first time seeing someone boomered. Guess what? Its my first time boomering when playing a FP game as well.

On a side note, I realize everything that I did affected everyone around me. I will take responsibility. I will admit my mistakes. Not going to run anymore. I'm really sorry for the wrong things that I've done.

And nothing lasts for ever. Not even love. Looking back, I don't regret loving and losing. But I regret losing even before trying. I found a photo of one of this guy I had a HUGE crush on in the past. The thing is I didnt tell anyone about it. By the time someone knew, I was already attached to my ex. So I never knew... And it has become a thing of the past. Looking at the photo, I realized that, I don't want to live my life the same way for the rest of my life.

I regretted not telling you I loved you then. I regretted not trying. But this regret makes me change for the better. I will tell the people I love I love them. Before its too late.

This blog is only known by a few.

So I wouldn't feel exposed if I confess here.

Got to build up courage somewhere right?

So here goes.

I love you, Capybaras. Forever and ever.